Author Archives: Paul Carlucci

About Paul Carlucci

Paul Carlucci's journalism and creative non-fiction have been published in the Vancouver Review, Yonge Street Media, eye Weekly, Spacing, Adbusters, NOW Magazine, SBC Skateboard, Rue Morgue, SMUT, The Globe and Mail and others. He’s worked across Canada as an editor, reporter or columnist, wandering from the East Coast to the West, and back again. His short fiction has appeared in the Vancouver Review, Darwin’s Bastards, and is forthcoming in the fall 2011 edition of the Feathertale Review. In 2009, a play he wrote was brought to the stage at Whistler Ski and Snowboard Festival; it was about a grungy, wingless cupid who inadvertently causes a murder on a gondola.

The thing about microphones

Here’s the thing about microphones: Stick one in front of a fool, and he just gets louder.

Unfortunately, you can’t really blame him, can you? Fools are foolish, just like lungs are for breathing and fire burns. Trying to change an idiot is like lecturing rocks for being too hard. They don’t care and can’t change anyway.

So when the National Peace Council of Ghana admonished MP Kennedy Agyepong for making some very nasty threats surrounding next year’s elections, they kind of missed the mark, like berating pus and ignoring bacteria. What they should’ve done is upbraid the news media.

Agyepong is a member of parliament for the opposition New Patriotic Party (NPP). Like a lot of his crew, he really wants the NPP to win next year’s elections and unseat the ruling New Democratic Congress (NDC). Recently, he told Citi FM that the country would devolve into a Rwanda-like massacre if anybody from the NDC messes around at the polls. Rwanda. He actually said that. You know, like the kind of pre-planned, media-assisted, eyeball-to-eyeball homicide that kills about a million people in 100 days and forever damages a nation’s psyche.

Agyepong was answering to Koku Anyidoho, the NDC director of communications for presidency. Anyidoho recently bellied up to a microphone at a radio station in the U.K. to taunt and provoke NPP leader Nana Akufo-Addo and his supporters. This, he said, was in response to Akufo-Addo’s own slogan of “All die be die,” which, in pigeon English, basically means go fight for victory and who cares if you die. People from the NPP camp insist it was President John Atta Mills who set the whole thing off by comparing the coming campaigns to Kenya’s election crisis of 2007-08.

Ghana is a relatively stable place, but, during the 2008 election campaign, there was deadly political violence in the north. Now, with the country’s sixth election fast approaching, civil society is ringing the alarm about the increasingly volatile nature of political discourse.

So far, you don’t hear too much about the media’s role in all this. Agyepong and Anyidoho were quoted many times, verbatim, as are all politicians in this country when they work themselves into indignant lathers. First pronounced on the radio, their words were sucked into an echo-chamber and bounced all over the country. Newspaper reporters fall over themselves to publish – or, if you like, recycle – these kinds of comments. Aggregating websites group together those same stories. Morning radio panels broadcast the day’s newspaper headlines.

The whole thing is really quite dangerous. Think about it: Now, out there in the national imagination, is the suggestion that next year’s elections have bitter ethnic dimensions, that maybe cutting someone’s head off with a machete is acceptable and likely behavior, that certain political camps are ready to be actively violent in defence of what they deem as opposition transgressions.

In a country where literacy is low, poverty is high, and democracy is young, a lot of people get really swept up in this stuff. Look at the power of Radio Télévision Libre Mille-Collines in Rwanda, the role of vernacular radio stations in Kenya, and the state broadcaster in Côte D’Ivoire. Now think about propaganda in Nazi Germany. People, unfortunately, are putty, malleable little tragedies waiting to be marched off whatever cliff happens to be highest.

Media need to realize this a pre-election phase in the country. They need to think hard about the guests they invite on broadcast shows, about the quotes they run in newspapers, and the depth they give political coverage in general.

Right now, it’s kind of a mess.

Open Letter to Sobbing Beggar Child

Please, for the purposes of smooth narration, allow me to lump you in with all the others: short and scruffy street brats, dirt-faced and hungry, smeared cherubs wandering around with your palms out. I know you’re all different: sex and gender; histories, national and personal; favourite colours; rows of teeth. But you’re also one seriously disconcerting issue, and so it’s easier, just for now, to make you singular.

The first time I saw you was near the airport in Accra. You were a little boy. We were in traffic, and you appeared at my window, moving your hand back and forth from your mouth. I had a banana in my bag, some hormone-exaggerated specimen from the Washington airport, and I gave it to you. You weren’t impressed. We didn’t see each other again for months.

Then I had to go work in Takoradi for a week.   You were still a boy, a light skinned North African in a green shirt with loose curls all over your head. You were trying to insinuate yourself in a clutch of pedestrian traffic. You’d grab onto people’s hands, the hems of their shirts, the waists of their dresses. I knew you would come for me. I didn’t tell you last time, but I have a shaky view on giving money to you, on giving anything to you. I mean, look, there’s your mom right there, sitting on a blanket twiddling her thumbs. I might give her money if she asked me. It’s true. But you? It seems like the wrong kind of reinforcement.

It’s your rights I have in mind, not my fifty pesewa. I promise. But there’s a language barrier between us, not to mention an education barrier, and an age barrier. I didn’t think you’d understand. So when you grabbed my hand, like I knew you would, I didn’t even look down at you. I swallowed some lump of discomfort and shook myself free. We saw each other often that week, didn’t we?

Then, one time, I was taking the bus back from Abidjan, and I was in the jungle, where everything is so beautiful. I mean, wow: in rural Western Region, everything was engorged with green and throbbing like mad. Kids played soccer in a well-trod clearing of maroon sand, their red and blue jerseys contrasting with the foliage like fireworks.

Except you. The bus was moving slow along the bumpy, muddy road, and you, filthy and shirtless, ran alongside it, one hand held up imploringly, the other missing entirely. I couldn’t be sure if your mother was around, using you for alms. I couldn’t even be sure if it would matter if she was. So here’s my contrition: I was grateful the bus sped up and saved me a conflict between my intellect and my feelings.

I’ve seen you around since then. No doubt. If I look hard enough, I see you everywhere. You’re like, and I don’t mean to be rude, all the trash blowing in the dirty breeze. You’re ubiquitous, you know? So I bemoan the state of the world and carry on.

I mean, what can I do? How can I do it? What’s the right thing? The progressive thing? What’s, like, the solution? I don’t know, so I don’t offer any momentum, neither backwards nor forwards.

But you got to me the other day, you know. I’ve seen you at this corner before, seen your parents sitting on blankets across the street, laughing and eating. They make me sick, your parents. Normally, I use my self-righteous hatred to distract myself from your needs, which, as we’ve established, make me really uncomfortable.

But the other day? You were balling your eyes out. I had my window open. I was reading a book. In the corner of my eye, I saw you float up to me. Normally, I wouldn’t look at you. But the tears; just squalling. So I looked. You had your light brown hair in braids, maybe four of them. You were missing some teeth. There was snot around your nose and tears streaming down your face and your little hand wiping over and over and over as you leaned against the taxi. And I just looked at you. And you just looked at me.

Then the light turned green and I left without helping.

Sorry, okay?

I just don’t get it.

No Country for Old Women

Rush hour in Accra: It’s where meticulous, Ghanaian refinement goes to die. You see adults, grown men and women in formal wear, hurl themselves at moving vehicles, faces all squished up with competitive strain, and it’s just a shameless melee of flying elbows and civil degradation. A few days ago, I saw a little old lady nearly trampled as she tried to climb onto one of the battered public transit vans called tro-tros.

The whole thing is a sort of contradiction in motion. Most Ghanaians are very polite and proper. They don’t project the type of image you’d associate with shoving children into puddles to secure a swift ride to work. More than that, Ghana makes a very big show of respecting its elders. If you want to run afoul of popular decency, you don’t have to trample an old lady in the backseat of a tro-tro. Just address her by her fist name. It won’t go over well.

But the deal breaks there. Growing old can be tough anywhere. In the West, you might find yourself quarantined in some clinical facility, drooling at soap opera reruns, a tray of untouched pees in your lap, and one son who works in middle management and hasn’t visited in four years. Family dynamics in Africa don’t typically permit that sort of thing. The extended family is huge, and members generally don’t migrate too far from one another. There’s a support system for young and old alike, a kind of social capital borne in the blood.

But some researchers say that’s changing, thanks to urbanization, westernization, globalization – all those -isms and -izations that so completely permeate the world. Increasingly, seniors can only rely on themselves.

Meanwhile, there are more senior women than men. The gender break down complicates things even further. Of the 107,000 pensioners in 2010, just 17,229 were women. That’s because most women work in the informal sector. They sell kola nuts in the market. They grill plantains on the side of the road. They hawk fish at the docks.

Maybe they’re like Mariana Sayitou, a 67-year-old bean seller in Old Fadama, one of Accra’s more controversial slums. She makes about CAN $18 a day. That money goes to feeding her and three of her kids, as well as paying school fees and buying textbooks. Her ex-husband, who divorced her after a row between in-laws, lives in the north and doesn’t help with the children at all. She feels lucky, because whenever she gets sick, her 30-year-old son will take her to the hospital. Call that the last vestiges of the African familial support system.

You can ask Mariana if she’s lonely, and she’ll laugh. It isn’t a bitter laugh. It’s a surprised laugh, like maybe no one has asked her that before. Yeah, she’s lonely. But she doesn’t want to marry again. She wants to focus on her children, wants to make sure they’re educated and successful.

That way, they can take care of her when she’s finally too old to work.

‘Yesterday was an historic day’

A neighbour stopped me on my way to work.

“Hello?” she called out. “Hello?”

It was October 21, one day after Colonel Muammar Gaddafi was killed.

“Yesterday was an historic day,” she said, wanting to make sure I was aware. It was hard to tell if she was happy or sad, or still trying to figure it out.

At work, reporters and editors crowded around the flat screen TV in the newsroom. They watched Gaddafi – bloodied, confused, babbling, humiliated – as he stumbled through the crowd, his prominent chin, so square and noble in his usurping youth, now just a sagging, spattered punctuation mark in history.

The reactions were mixed. There was jubilation. There was ambivalence. And there was anger.

“We will wash your revenge in the blood of your enemies,” I heard one reporter mutter under her breath.

Throughout the week, TV news played images of Gaddafi’s naked corpse rotting in a meat locker, his penis pixalated, his skin an odd, dead colour, and all around him Libyans taking pictures with their cell phones, trying to lock up digitally the massive, historical change made metaphor right at their feet.

It’s a jarring sight, diametrically opposed to the images of Gaddafi we typically see. The brother leader, the king of kings, dressed in his military livery, in his traditional garb, wearing aviators, expounding from a podium, always in control. Now naked and dead and surrounded by cell phone cameras. It’s the Hussein-in-a-hole effect, like Mubarak in a cage, like Charles Taylor in a courtroom, like Slobodan Milosevic at the Hague: power denuded, power made vulnerable, so pathetically so that it’s a little bit laughable, if only because it seems so impossible.

“It makes me sad to see him like that,” said an Auntie who runs a South La bar. “It makes me sad.”

A lot of people remember a younger Gaddafi. He overthrew Libya’s monarchy when he was just 27, and in the years since he threw all kinds of ideas into the African imagination, first in the north and then across the Sub-Saharan regions as well. He promised Arab socialism in his Green Book. He wanted a United States of Africa, and his rhetoric was purple with pan-African sentiment. It made some people proud: See Gaddafi at the UN, wending his way through an hour of oratory, demanding trillions in reparations for colonialism.

The reporter who whispered for his bloody revenge called him an African hero. One of my roommates will never forget when Gaddafi’s entourage drove to Ghana from Tripoli, and he gestured wildly recounting the details, the vehicles expensive and impressive, the soldiers well-dressed and disciplined, and in their wake gifts of cars for the government.

But that’s not the narrative told in the West. In the West, where Gaddafi is inextricably associated with terrorist acts like Lockerbie, he was a super villain, the kind of guy who wanted his picture taken with the likes of Idi Amin, Uganda’s post-Independence psychopath, or Bashar al-Assad, who is brutally repressing his own revolution in Syria. Even the uneasy, post-9/11 alliance didn’t really wash in the public. Western news narratives don’t often permit nuance. There are good guys and bad, and not much in between.

Here, even in proud eulogies, there’s at least quiet acknowledgment of Gaddafi’s darker side. Absolute power, people say, it’ll do that: torture, murder, abductions. And sometimes they say nothing at all; it’s just a trick of tonality, a dark cloud floating in their voice, disappointment in denial. You hear it, but you aren’t told.

“It was an historic day,” my neighbour said again, and you figure it’ll take her some time to make sense of all that history.

The bureaucracy is still bronzing itself: Continued misadventures in the Ghanaian news-gathering process

Weep on this: Hinges creek and the door opens to the public relations office of the Ministry of Local Government and Rural Development. Some guy in a purple shirt and dress pants is sleeping upright on the couch, legs spread open, cell phone loose in one of his hands, his trophy gut rising proudly in the climate-controlled air between us. It’s maybe 3:30 in the afternoon.

“Excuse me?”

He rouses himself not unpleasantly.

“Sorry to wake you.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” he says, motioning to a chair. “Please sit.”

We sit.

“We’re from the Daily Guide,” I say. “We’re doing a story on disability in Ghana, and we’re interested in learning about the District Assemblies’ Common Fund. There’s some money there earmarked for the disabled, and we’d like to understand why it hasn’t been disbursed.”

He nods placidly. “I am not the public relations officer,” he says. “But he is coming. I am also waiting for him.”

I sigh as the guy’s eyes flutter and close. In Ghana, when someone says he’s coming, it could mean he’s just around the corner and will arrive imminently. But it could also mean that he lives in Baltimore and has vague plans to visit next year for his nephew’s daughter’s wedding. The only way to know for sure is to wait.

Amazingly, the officer arrives in less than ten minutes. He walks in the door looking thin and senior and comfortably entrenched in his position.

“We’re from Daily Guide,” I say, and he cuts me off.

“Daily Guide?” He sounds exasperated. “Just some days ago we had a program and you weren’t there. And I even called your editor and you weren’t there. And now you are here. Oh!”

He continues on in this vein for some time. That we have never heard of him or his program does not faze him. That we are neither news editors nor assignment editors does not mitigate his outrage. He must have his say.

“But how can I help you?” he asks abruptly, his tirade spent.

We give the spiel anew. We’ve gone through this ordeal before, so we’ve brought letters of request, several of which we’ve already dropped off at other ministries. We hand him one, and he studies it impatiently.

There are different breeds of bureaucrat in this country. There are those who aren’t bothered with all this nonsensical protocol, the sole design of which is to obfuscate journalists; they’ll speak to you because they think something should be said. There are those who would very much like to, but they acquiesce to protocol because they don’t want to be punished for speaking out of turn; they’ll try their hardest to facilitate the process. Then there are those who curl up with protocol and nap with it on the office furniture, those who caress its matted fur and sometimes feed on its forgotten meals. They’re what Terri Gilliam was railing against when he directed Brazil.

“This is not in an envelope,” he says. “I cannot pass it along.”

“But, sir,” says my colleague, “we have dropped off several already without envelopes.”

He will not budge. Those other ministries, trivial entities like Justice and Social Welfare, they are not “big” like Local Government. They couldn’t hope to grasp protocol. Only Local Government understands these things.

“Okay,” I say, “so we will just include in our article that you denied our interview request because –”

“You will not misquote me!” he shouts. “We will sue you!”

The sleeping man explodes from the couch like an eruption of swamp gas. He gets in my face and starts yelling, pointing his finger at my mouth and my eyes and my nose, all the while pacing and shouting.

“It is not proper!” he yells. “You do not respect our culture!” He turns to my colleague. “You should be teaching him our culture!”

The two of them carry on, shouting louder and louder every time I reiterate that we’ll have to publish a small paragraph saying they denied us the interview because our request was not delivered in an envelope. I’m never actually able to finish the whole sentence, however, because they’re stamping around like elephants with official parking spaces.

After, in the blazing heat outside, I’m a sweat-drenched study in extreme vexation. But my colleague is unperturbed. She’s used to that kind of incompetence.

“And,” she says to me, “it’s your culture that brought all this letters and envelopes thing. We had our own ways to communicate.”

Takoradi’s lost daughters

Night falls fast and dark over downtown Takoradi. Market Circle, the town’s commercial epicentre, is a phantasmagoria of weird shadows and trampled produce. Streetlights are sporadic, and whole sections of road are sometimes just trails through inky darkness, the massive holes in the sidewalks almost invisible in the gloom.

But the Zenith Hotel, pitched up next to a shared taxi station a bit north of the circle, is a hub of twilit debauchery, a cacophonous contrast to all that slumbers around it. A popular guidebook bills it as a backpacker’s retreat, not optimal, but pretty sweet in a pinch. Clearly, this is an entry made before the era of oil.

The Zenith is now an overflowing sexpot. Prostitutes slink along the streets outside, wending through food vendors, drunks, beggars, and taxi drivers. Inside, they roam a poorly lit courtyard peppered with men wearing that look of slack-lipped, post-coital stupidity, or else its counterpart: pinch-faced, sex-starved frustration.

Sandra strides into this atmosphere, simultaneously short and tall, thanks to a pile of thick and multicoloured dreads rising from her head and streaming down her back. She’s shy when you ask her age, giggling that she’s 20 years old and batting her eyes at the floor. But she gets frank fast.

“First you pay,” she says, “and then you fuck.”

She has an apartment somewhere in town, but keeps a room here for GH$2.50 – about  CAN$1.75 – and brings her clients in there for simple sex, with romance and alternate positions costing extra. She’ll start at GH$10 and work up from there. If you’re a regular, and you show up broke, she’ll front you some time in her room. But cross her and she’ll sic the guards on you.

Sandra studied banking in Nigeria. She effortlessly tosses around figures and pay schemes, appropriated from that sector to this one. She loves her country and wants to go home in January. Her mom warned her not to come here to begin with.

Emilia doesn’t have any of that confidence. She creeps around the shadows outside the Zenith. Eighteen-years-old, she came here from Accra with a friend about a month ago. She says her parents are dead, her family scattered.

“There is only me,” she whispers over a malt.

She says she hasn’t had sex yet, and she doesn’t want to. She just dresses the part and wanders the streets. She swears up and down that she’s going home after the weekend. But then she says she doesn’t really have a home or anywhere to go. Just back to Accra. Nothing more specific.

It’s hard to say if Emilia is actually 18. She definitely doesn’t look it. And Sandra, with blemishes across her cheeks, doesn’t really look 20. But those are the ages they claim. And they could be telling the truth.

There are some around who don’t even make the effort to lie. A colleague says he met a self-admitted 12-year-old at the Zenith. The Mercy Foundation supports that idea, saying child prostitutes frequent the Zenith, as well as a bar called Harbour View, which looks out over the dockyards in Takoradi. And then there are the beaches in both Sekondi and Takoradi, where children ply their trade among fishermen and sand-flies.

These children are known as the Thousand Girls, a reference to Ghana’s old currency, meaning they will go for $GH10 or less. They aren’t so much the children that oil forgot as they are the ones it never cared about in the first place.

“Before you get them, you have to pass through some grown-ups,” says Comfort Osei Gerning, a foster mother with Mercy Foundation. “They will collect the money from you and show you the place.

“It’s someone’s business.”

Pounding Fu, or How to Pass a Law in Ghana

It’s a bit like a heartbeat. Around dinner time, a deep and gentle pounding floats over compound walls and is smothered in the din of Accra’s audio debris. This is the bass line of fufu preparation. Cassava is mixed with yam or plantain. It’s placed in a pestle and pounded with a long, wooden mortar, until a sticky ball of paste is achieved, after which it’s added to soup or stew. It’s a slow process, but nurturing and vital, and worth the time.

So too the passage of legislation in Ghana. At times, as with the recent approval of a $3 billion loan from China, Parliament positively lopes. But most times, as with the Right to Information or Mental Health Bills, the institution staggers and crawls, utterly indifferent to time and expediency.

Bright Simons is an analyst with the IMANI Centre for Policy and Education. He breaks legislation into five categories, each with its own rate of passage.

There are those laws that benefit the political elite, like compensation regulations, and they’re wrapped up in no time at all.

There are those laws that are really just amendments to existing legislation, and they too are a fait accompli.

There are bills promoted by donor nations, or multi- and bilateral institutions. These laws are driven by financial and political pressure systems like aid dollars and phone calls from presidents. They tend to hurry along.

There are bills with partisan engines, and they can be problematic. If the government wants to pass a bill with a financial implication, then a cumbersome, constitutional process kicks in. The opposition is not beholden to that process, but, then, who cares about them? This is an arena of majority politics, after all, and the tyranny of math reigns supreme over any opposition machination.

Finally, slowest of all, there’s the category of social bills, lonely stacks of paper like Mental Health or Right to Information, which have none of the momentum, however laughable, of the other categories.

“Who is the real owner, so to speak?” asks Simons. “It’s a point about ownership of laws. Whose interest is being served in that agenda? If it is diffused, and it also doesn’t serve the interest of the political elite, and they cannot use it for some kind of partisan promotion, and for some reason donors are not willing to expend political capital, then you have a problem.”

Aha. So you have to take some cassava and throw in some yam if you want to enjoy your stew. You have to pound category five into some other category, preferably three, with all its financial and political clout.

“A very interesting one is the cocoa issue,” says Simons. “Because the United States government wanted to respect certain provisions that prevent people from buying or sourcing cocoa in countries where child labour is practiced, the US diplomatic community in Ghana, put together a lot of political capital to get that kind of legislation through and those regulations put in place.”

Likewise the mining industry and the Whistleblowers Act. With the specter of Sierra Leone’s blood diamonds forever haunting Western guilt reflexes, donor countries began cutting conflict sources from their supply chains – outwardly, anyway. But certain economic entities are not burdened by such shackles, outwardly or otherwise.

“In Ghana,” says Simons, “all of a sudden you begin to see a situation where donor interest and political interest in Ghana felt that our laws must encourage such practices because otherwise they might also lose out to the Chinese, or they might lose out to the Indians, who may not be subject to the same level of control back home.”

But of course there are caveats. If a donor nation is agitating for legislation that really irks the political elite, then Simons says they will chum up on a bilateral level – see Robert Mugabe and Muammar Gaddafi – and stand opposed.

And there will always be those instances when donor nations or anyone else couldn’t care less for some social issue, no matter what it means to general humanity. Witness the Mental Health Act.

“The interests are not clearly defined,” he says. “You can go and find donors, and donors will address it as part and parcel of the human rights agenda, but don’t forget that when it comes to that and there is elite indifference, unless the donors are also willing to escalate it to a political level, leaving it at the level of human rights, which is my view a technocratic level, won’t drive it.”

So no fu for you.

Only cynical bread.

Pounding Fu, or How to Pass a Law in Ghana

It’s a bit like a heartbeat. Around dinner time, a deep and gentle pounding floats over compound walls and is smothered in the din of Accra’s audio debris. This is the bass line of fufu preparation. Cassava is mixed with yam or plantain. It’s placed in a pestle and pounded with a long, wooden mortar, until a sticky ball of paste is achieved, after which it’s added to a soup or stew. It’s a slow process, but nurturing and vital and worth the time.

So too the passage of legislation in Ghana. At times, as with the recent approval of a $3 billion loan from China, Parliament positively lopes. But most times, as with the Right to Information or Mental Health Bills, the institution staggers and crawls, utterly indifferent to time and expediency.

Bright Simons is an analyst with the IMANI Centre for Policy and Education. He breaks legislation into five categories, each with its own rate of passage.

There are those laws that benefit the political elite, like compensation regulations, and they’re wrapped up in no time at all.

There are those laws that are really just amendments to existing legislation, and they too are a fait accompli.

There are bills promoted by donor nations, or multi- and bilateral institutions. These laws are driven by financial and political pressure systems like aid dollars and phone calls from presidents. They tend to hurry along.

There are bills with partisan engines, and they can be problematic. If the government wants to pass a bill with a financial implication, then a cumbersome, constitutional process kicks in. The opposition is not beholden to that process, but, then, who cares about them? This is an arena of majority politics, after all, and the tyranny of math reigns supreme over any opposition intention.

Finally, slowest of all, there’s the category of social bills, lonely stacks of paper like Mental Health or Right to Information, which have none of the momentum, however laughable, of the other categories.

“Who is the real owner, so to speak?” asks Simons. “It’s a point about ownership of laws. Whose interest is being served in that agenda? If it is diffused, and it also doesn’t serve the interest of the political elite, and they cannot use it for some kind of partisan promotion, and for some reason donors are not willing to expend political capital, then you have a problem.”

Aha. So you have to take some cassava and throw in some yam if you want to enjoy your stew. You have to pound category five into some other category, preferably three, with all its financial and political clout.

“A very interesting one is the cocoa issue,” says Simons. “Because the United States government wanted to respect certain provisions that prevent people from buying or sourcing cocoa in countries where child labour is practiced, the US diplomatic community in Ghana, put together a lot of political capital to get that kind of legislation through and those regulations put in place.”

Likewise the mining industry and the Whistleblowers Act. With the specter of Sierra Leone’s blood diamonds forever haunting Western guilt reflexes, donor countries began cutting conflict sources from their supply chains – outwardly, anyway. But certain economic entities are not burdened by such shackles, outwardly or otherwise.

“In Ghana,” says Simons, “all of a sudden you begin to see a situation where donor interest and political interest in Ghana felt that our laws must encourage such practices because otherwise they might also lose out to the Chinese, or they might lose out to the Indians, who may not be subject to the same level of control back home.”

But of course there are caveats. If a donor nation is agitating for legislation that really irks the political elite, then Simons says they will chum up on a bilateral level – see Robert Mugabe and Muammar Gaddafi – and stand opposed.

And there will always be those instances when donor nations or anyone else couldn’t care less for some social issue, no matter what it means to general humanity. Witness the Mental Health Act.

“The interests are not clearly defined,” he says. “You can go and find donors, and donors will address it as part and parcel of the human rights agenda, but don’t forget that when it comes to that and there is elite indifference, unless the donors are also willing to escalate it to a political level, leaving it at the level of human rights, which is my view a technocratic level, won’t drive it.”

So no fu for you.

Just cynical bread.

‘Every day, some children die here’

Most of us, somewhere along the way, have borne witness to the profound frailty of flesh. It could be that you’ve been touched by suicide, or that you’ve watched an elder die, or that violence, with or without design, has crashed and thrashed its way into your life.

In some parts of the world, a phalanx of sanitizers works tirelessly to rid us of such baggage. From smooth roads to American Idol, inconsequential drug abuse to reliable plumbing, there’s a mental and physical aesthetic that, incidentally or not, works well in the slow but sure subversion of most people’s trauma.

In other parts of the world, there is no such aesthetic. It has been smashed by corruption and politics and conflict, and only then if it existed to begin with. In its absence are all the many provocations of death.

There is, for example, a correlation between open sewers and cholera. There is a relationship between haggard roads and the piles of bodies that frequently gather at their sides. An unfinished building is not a far cry from a homeless person, who himself is much akin to an armed robber, who again brings to mind a frenzied, deadly mob of vigilantes. Perhaps most sadly of all, there is a clear and present connection between poverty and dead children.

Which brings us to Korle Bu Teaching Hospital’s emergency children’s ward. It’s a tiny place run by frustrated workers, their gripes wide and ranging, from lack of equipment and overcrowding, to low pay and long hours.

In here, the aesthetic is startling. It’s tiny kids curled up under small blankets, a few to a bed, one of them convulsing, his eyes glazed even as his brow furrows in contraction. It’s cribs that look like the baskets of bicycles. It’s only one incubator.

“Every day, some children die here,” says Professor Bamenla Goka, head of the hospital’s child care department. “Most of the children coming in with medical problems are from the lower socio-economic group, which is understandable because many of the illnesses that we see are related to poverty in one way or the other.”

Those children who do die at Korle Bu, they usually go within the first 24 hours of their stay. Sometimes the first 12. Maybe their parents have not signed up for insurance, and, rather than bear care costs they couldn’t afford, they wasted precious time administering home medicine.

“We all agree that the emergency ward in Korle Bu is quite small, but it has made a name and everyone wants to go there,” says Dr. Afisah Zakariah, head of the Policy Planning, Monitoring and Evaluation Directorate of the Ministry of Health.

It’s a tertiary hospital, she continues, which means it’s a referral centre, and patients overburden the place when they skip the primary and secondary institutions. As for salaries, nurses make two or three times that of civil servants. She finds their complaints offensive. She also says Korle Bu has a budget to procure its own equipment, and, besides, a needs assessment of a year ago will deliver new equipment soon.

“The waiting has gone on for too long,” says Goka. “The emergency room is inhumane for the patients who are there, their parents, and for the staff, so we are appealing that the emergency room refurbishment is done by all means.”

Meanwhile, some children die everyday.

“Now we have to focus on an audit of child death, so that we actually see what is going on,” says Zakariah. “If every day we lose a child, then we really need to sit up and see what is going.”

Which brings us back to aesthetics. Healthiness is a holistic state of being. It’s biology interfacing with lifestyle and infrastructure, interfacing with development.

“So paying attention to people’s education, housing, and food availability will all help to keep people healthy,” says Goka.

In sheep’s clothing (with gold watches)

God is everywhere in Ghana. His proclamations are stenciled on the rear windows of trundling taxis and tro-tros; His grandeur is recalled in the names of chop bars and canteens; self-styled preachers shout His verses in the quiet of rising dawn; every Sunday morning, His people flow through the streets, all wildly coloured dresses and finely tailored suits, off to glory in his name. In a country of big men, God is surely the biggest.

It follows that there is celebrity in his service. There is wealth and adulation. In the physical absence of God, it is the pastor who is exalted.

Promises of such dizzying stature are sure to attract rogues, cheats, and charlatans, and the country has been experiencing a wave of pastor-perpetrated crime, especially against women.

Vaginas are beset by evil spirits, and only a righteous penis can cleanse them. Or righteous fingers. Or, for that matter, tongues. Sometimes, there isn’t any such pretense, and pastors rape both minors and adults. One pastor conned an exorbitant sum from a British national, telling her, quite simply, that she would die if she didn’t hand it over. Another pastor was caught smuggling a young girl from Accra to Ivory Coast.

It goes on. At length.

So now the debate: Does government have legislative responsibility? Should it establish a regulatory environment and deploy a monitoring agency? Or is this something religious institutions should address? Can their own licensing and recognition apparatus snuff out the wave of come-lately churches these pastors call pulpit? It’s a collision of rights: life and religion; association and cruel, degrading treatment.

Some people in the human rights community – like Amnesty International Ghana or the National Council on Women and Development – don’t seem especially interested in the debate. You ask them for opinions, and they offer none. Others, like the outspoken Human Rights Advocacy Centre, are calling for regulations. Religious freedom, they say, is not synonymous with pastoral predation.

But the clergy has not necessarily followed suit. The chairman of the Christian Council of Ghana did so in the media, but he wasn’t joined by the Pentecostal or Charismatic movements. The latter believes existing institutions should be strengthened, and government’s only role should be public support of their licensing and training systems.

Meanwhile, the public itself has to develop more church savvy. One rogue pastor pulled a flock of almost 10,000, a staggering number compared to the 3,000 or so claimed by seemingly more legitimate bodies.

Regional relativity aside, Ghana is a poor country with a lot of desperate people. They want travel visas. They want children and stable marriages. They want jobs and money. They go to church thinking these things can be obtained in the pews, and at the pulpit they find a jewel-encrusted miracle-worker who promises them the same.

Trickery reigns. One Ghanaian said some pastors mic their pews; people pray out-loud, in rushed voices, and their wants are transmitted to the pastor’s ear-bud – call it Divine Knowledge. And then there are the small victories, a smooth talking pastor who reconciles husband and wife, thus ensuring the woman, whose economic potential is vastly devalued, saves not just her marriage, but her house, food, and clothing. Never underestimate the devotion of gratitude.

It’s interesting to note that, at least according to media stories, the law does work. Pastors commit crimes. They are caught, arrested, tried, convicted, and jailed. In many ways, it’s a testament to a police service often criticized for corruption. But these machinations are reactive. They don’t seem to be slowing the production of victims.

So the central question is this: Can the church be trusted do deal with this on its own? Maybe. But that didn’t really work with the Roman Catholics, did it?